Why Mila Kunis & Chris Stark Video Interview on BBC went viral

Why do you think this interview over so many other thousands of interviews a day went viral and got over 10 million views?

Yes, everyone has an opinion and there is a simple answer…..

You might think….

  • It’s Mila Kunis!
  • Awwww the interviewer is a cute kid.
  • I feel bad for Chris Stark.
  • Mila Kunis was sweet.
  • It’s the BBC and that gave it leverage.

The answer is even more simple than that. And when you realize it, you’ll understand the key of learning to connect no matter if it’s connecting one on one or connecting to an audience.

Have a watch and let me know your opinion below!

Do You Ever Wake Up In Tears?

Some mornings I wake up crying.

If this was the end of 2009 or 2010 then it would have most likely been tears of pain, exasperation, and frustration.

Today, tears of joy.

Everyone Is Fighting A Battle. Be Kind

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind.

First world, second world, third world problems? All relative to where you are!

We have no right to judge another person’s journey. We have no right to compare and contrast as if one person’s hell is worse than another’s.

Each of us is having our experience.

As you read this, I honor where you’ve come from, where you are right now.

Regardless of who you are and how I know you, I see the greatest in you. Doesn’t matter one bit if you don’t. I do.

Choosing Struggle & Pain

Some of us make it really really really hard.

Some of us create extraordinary results and impact many lives all the while working our butts off managing struggle, frustration and disconnection.

It begs the question…

If you can do so much good like that, then what could you do if struggle, frustration and disconnection wasn’t there?

The realization is the only time I’ve felt disconnected was ignoring and not allowing connection to flow.

As my soul brother Steven S Sadleir says “the secret is allowing yourself to feel what is already there. if you’re not feeling bliss, it’s only because you’re ignoring it or denying it. Know you have a choice. Come back again and again”

I’ve heard this lesson for years and have routinely forgotten & then remembered.

My Greatest Desire For You

My greatest desire is you remember more often that struggle, pain and disconnection is a choice.

Whether personal professional life, it’s all personal because we’re human.

In an instant it can shift. I know from personal experience it is a conscious choice. I’ve worked over 30+ years justifying holding on and making things hard, as if pain and struggle are a requirement.

I’m here teaching what I’m learning. As do we all.

Does this resonate?

What’s your choice?

What step will you make towards what you’d prefer in your business, your life, your relationship.

It’s my profound privilege to be of service to you in whatever form that takes.

If you only knew who I know that will literally transform your life from where you are now to where you’d prefer….

If you only knew what I will do to magnify the results you have now…

It might start by staying in touch by opting in on the right side.

Well that’s a choice isn’t it….

Vulnerability: The Secret To Creating Connection

Vulnerability is NOT a weakness.

Vulnerability is your greatest STRENGTH! ….and I can prove it.

Yes, my friends, I’m going there because someone needs to say it.

Over the last 11 years that I’ve consciously studied networking and human connection, I’ve come across an abundance of external techniques, tricks and processes that absolutely worked to influence and persuade people to do what we want, BUT

the #1 most effective thing I’ve found to create instant connection is being vulnerable.

I probably should call this a secret since most business people I’ve worked with don’t believe that something like Vulnerability is their greatest strength in generating more leads and closing more sales.

Now I can dice that up to:

  • Being “present”
  • Authenticity
  • Sincerity
  • Making it about them: Show them you care
  • Not trying to “talk over” something
  • Being Compassionate
  • Treat them like a human!

But here I am again answering the question I get most “Thomas, how the heck do so many cool people know your name and speak so highly of you?”

Well it’s always a weird thing, because I figure I’m looking in the mirror and having a conversation with another human being.  Too simple? 

  • How would I like to be treated?
  • What would I ask me if I was in front of myself?  <—ok that’s a mind blower!

Learning to connect, starting a conversation, cultivating likeablity…it’s not a mystery. Some people make it hard, but really it’s far more simple if you let go and use this guidance.

Don’t believe me….how about watching a world renowned researcher share what she found…

After you click through, share your thoughts.

Brené Brown studies human connection — our ability to empathize, belong, love. In a poignant, funny talk, she shares a deep insight from her research, one that sent her on a personal quest to know herself as well as to understand humanity.

One more if perks your interest.

What do you think? LEAVE A COMMENT!

Share your thoughts below!

How To Offer What You HAVE & Get What You Want Without Being A Jerk

A conversation with two “connectors” that have generated MILLIONS for clients.

Being a connector isn’t  just what you do, it’s how you’re being.

It’s not a choice of being a professional networker/connector or offering “x” product or service.

EVERYONE should be an extraordinary connector first!

If you’re known as the “go to” guy or girl, then don’t you think you’ll be top of mind?

When you’re top of mind and offering value like that, you’ll get more people asking “Hey, what are you up to lately? how can I be of service to YOU!”

If you’ve wondered “How can I offer what I have and get what I want without being a ________?” <— insert your favorite descriptor, then watch this video with Beth Jolley of and Thomas Mangum.

Leave a comment with what resonates for you!

Social Networking #FAIL

facebook FAIL

What would YOU do?

I got a friend request.

I responded to someone that recently sent me a friend request because they are in San Diego.

I wanted to engage.

They said they had no interest in a chat, meetup, whatever.

hmmm that’s strange…why would they send me a request then?  Remember… they friended ME. I replied to them “So, why did you friend me? What is that perked your interest?”

They said “oh, I just wanted to expand my network.”

hmmmm…yeah THAT’s gonna work!


Ladies and gentlemen, that is what you call a networking #FAIL.

Why the heck would you connect online if you have no interest in actually engaging? Weird.

Seriously, what purpose can that serve?  Did they think an extra friend will magically equal a dollar in their pocket?

Gosh I don’t know.

What do think?

Building Relationships One Massage At A Time

No I didn’t mean “building relationships one MESSAGE at a time”.  I do indeed mean MASSAGE.

now that's a lot of massages

This weekend, I was in Las Vegas at a big event that focuses on helping businesses that want to generate more leads online and I ended up on the Las Vegas strip getting a massage with a bunch of people.

What in the world does that have to do with learning to connect; learning to network and becoming a masterful networker?

While there was plenty of wisdom from the speakers on the stage, the GOLD is comes from what happens on breaks and outside the room.

Leads, prospects, strategic partners and clients come out of relationships.

Why oh why would you EVER be focused first on “gotta find a client”, “gotta find a client”, “gotta find a client”????  This is nutty!

Of course if what you’re doing is working for you great!

Otherwise, ask this question….

“If what I’m doing is working so well, then why aren’t my results different?”   <—- whatever you ask, get honest with the answers to the questions you ask.

Becoming a masterful networker is about cultivating those relationships, so why would you focus only on the wisdom from a speaker on stage and treat the people in the room less?  Yet it happens ALL THE TIME!

You wonder how the heck I know who I know and want to learn how I do it.  Well this is it….


Have a drink!

Break bread!

Get a massage together!

group massage

I invest FAR more time on the breaks and outside the room hanging out with people.

A)  It’s more fun than sitting in a seat listening for hours on end and

B)  INTERACTING and ENGAGING is building a relationship

So next time, maybe it IS time to go enjoy yourself and share a massage. You might just meet your next partner!


Leave a comment. Share your thoughts. And best yet, share your email on the right and let’s connect!!!


Even Connectors & Networkers Dislike Networking Events

What do you when you dislike or just plain hate networking events?

First off, it’s human to feel that.

Second is be the change. It’s more simple than you can imagine.

Watch this video on Learn To Connect NOW! with Thomas Mangum, Warren Whitlock and Warren’s version of humor!

We stopped fooling around at about 25:35 but you be the judge. hahahaha and yes I did say “willy”.

Personally, I feel that if you’re not having fun, you’re taking life WAY WAY WAY too seriously and maybe THAT is the reason you may not be connecting.  But really what the heck do I know?

Modeling being in the moment. Demonstrating you truly can talk with anyone, anytime, anywhere if you’re willing to be present and speak to whatever you’re feeling or want to ask in the moment.

What are your thoughts? Agree? Disagree? Love it? Hate it?

Leave your comments and tell your friends!

Vulnerability Is Your Gateway To Connecting With Your Audience

Think vulnerability is a weakness?

Think again!

Vulnerability in front of your audience is your greatest STRENGTH.

It is your gateway to authenticity and accessing that person in front of you.

Imagine if you were 17-18 years old and were speaking in front of hundreds of other teenagers.

How would you feel? How could you connect?

If you feel vulnerability couldn’t possibly be that gateway, watch vulnerability in action by Jordan, a high school senior deliver a commencement address at New Trier School that would rival ANY TED talk.

Tell your friends!

Share your thoughts!


Someone Is Waiting On You To Help Them

Sometimes all you need is a hand UP.

There is more money, support, wisdom, love and help than you could possibly imagine WHEN you choose to commit.

Reach out to someone. Connect.


Learn to ask for help



There are those you’re meant to serve yearning to hear from you. YOU are THEIR hand up. If you don’t care to reach out to someone for support for yourself, then do it for them.

Sometimes learning to connect with your audience starts with you learning to connect with you.